Changing My Mind

My friend  asked me what my theme of 2011 was...I thought about it for a second and then it came to me:

"Changing My Mind"

Some may think that I was wishy washy this year, that I wasn't stable and my plans changed constantly. Some of that may be true, but to be honest I was trying to follow the Spirit. I'm not trying to be on a high horse or anything, because I've been truly humbled this year over and over again. I've learned to pray and wait and listen like never before in my life. Being 21 and realizing I'm not married, not close to graduating and in a weird state is scary. But I've learned that if I put my trust in the Lord, He will take care of me. To the outside world it make look ike I can't make up my mine and its true...I can't. But at the end of the day I feel right in side and that I'm heading where the Lord wants me to be. Each day I'm becoming someone that God has confidence in and can trust. Its a day at a time, but slowly I'm getting there.

I'm excited for 2012, because I feel like a lot of my decisions have been made and now I can go and follow through with them. I really hope I get into the Special Education program. I hope that my relationship with my Savior continues to grow. I hope that 2012 is not the end of the world because I still have the rest of my life to live!

Legit Christmas Miracle

Good news has come my family's way! My grandpa who was diagnosed with an incurable cancer just got the news that after two rounds of chemo that his cancer has cleared! Amazing. Because of his age chemo was rough on him and so this is great news. Things are good and prayers have been answered. Hope more Christmas miracles come to all the world this month!

Temple Square

I love going to temple square. Even tho it was freezing I still enjoyed seeing all the lights and all the people. I love Christmas season!

Human After All

Heard this gem of a song on the ending of tonight's "Parenthood" episode. Kinda fell in love with it.

I've been really happy lately. But I'm single, basically broke and are always tired...how come I'm so happy? I think it has to do with some new things I've been trying.... I find myself so full of gratitude I sometimes have to wipe a tear away.

I still get the mission question a lot from people...it confuses me too...I was so set on going...and yet ever since I decided that I wasn't going the uncomfortable anxiety I felt before is gone. I'm super excited about my major change, I'm excited about being in my ward and I'm excited for a new year.

Stole this: Modesty

My friend posted a video on his blog...mostly I'd like to say amen.

In the Interim: Modesty

Bath day and thoughts

I took a bath today, and read my book in the tub. It was wonderful.

I have a lot of thoughts these days (what's new?). Mostly of future Husband. Sometimes I just get caught up in these moments where I can't wait to not be single. I know people tell me to enjoy my single years...but I'm pretty sure married life is better, so I can't help myself day dreaming about it. I have a lot of love bundled up inside of me reserved just for him. I can't wait to share this love with him. It may be a few more years, but day dreaming doesn't hurt, right?

I love and hate the Holidays. I love it because of the family dinners, the feeling in the air, the wonderful lights and fun decorations. I hate it because I always seem to feel so lonely. Ironic, eh? But to me the holidays signify the end of the year...meaning another year of being single has passed by. This holiday season I don't want to feel lonely. It will probably happen...but this year I'm going to try my best to just serve those around me and forget myself. I become so self centered sometimes it makes me sick.  I really try to do my best in this life...but sometimes I do fall short. I hope I can accomplish this goal.

can i get your number?

I watched a scene unfold last night. And it made me sick.

My singles ward was playing volleyball. We had a ton of people there, so we had to rotate out so everyone could play. A bit into it 2 girls showed up, dressed in jeans and having that flirty, cheesy laugh going on. My first thought, "Oh geeze." As time went on it was one of the girls turn to rotate in. When she got out she said, "That was the scariest thing in my life." Really? Playing volleyball is scary? Well...the boys loved it! They all started hovering around this girl. When she was on the side lines they'd be right next to her laughing at everything she said. While watching this...I was perplexed...are the guys really going for this? Yes she was cute, but also obviously 18 years old. 18! The boys around her...over 22, one was at least 25.

I know...have more love Stacy. Don't be so judgmental. Stop it with the angry, jealous thoughts. But guess who got a new number...she did. As she was leaving, a guy asked her for her number.

Me? I got nothing. The thing with this scenario is I see it happen over and over again. How do I get the boys attention without changing who I am?...I feel dumb even asking. I feel dumb even writing this. But what the heck...this is my blog and I get to write about anything I want to.